Dark Truth: Battledoors

August 3, 2019 I’d like to believe have no recollection of the path which led me from wilderness to desert, but I’d be fooling myself. I’d love to pretend I’m blind to the patterns of behavior that led me here, oblivious to the why and how, but I see it all clearly. A series of events; a string of low blows and wounding interactions actively … Continue reading Dark Truth: Battledoors

Dark Truth: The Thief in the Night

Flashback – March 24, 2019 What do you do when the wilderness swallows you whole? What do you do when there’s nothing left to say? When words have been forced out through fear and pain, only to fall short. Or worse! What do you do when disappointment and rejection steal your hope and faith in anything true and good? What are you left with? There … Continue reading Dark Truth: The Thief in the Night

Dark Truth: Energy Economics

August 1, 2019 I woke before the sun once again, nothing new, but certainly a reminder of my struggle. My mind and body are incapable of being on the same page; hell they’re not even in the same book. Some days, I sleep peacefully waking to a short reprieve from the incessant chatter, but most days it’s a race. A sprint to see if I … Continue reading Dark Truth: Energy Economics

Dark Truth: The Desert

The beginning: July 31, 2019 I sit here in silence, with the stark realization that this, this is the moment I’m meant to write about. For decades I’ve wanted to write “my story,” but I always thought my story was rooted in the past. The truth is, my story starts now, in this moment, because there is only now, and how the past effects the … Continue reading Dark Truth: The Desert

Dark Truth: Daily Journals (1)

Fire Walls I’ve struggled for nearly a year; struggled to regain any form of structure and consistency. Struggled to ‘get through’ another season of physical and emotional exhaustion. Struggled to break old patterns and build new roads. Struggled to make connections deeper than a thimble. Struggled to commit to the things which bring me joy. But most of all, I have struggled to love and … Continue reading Dark Truth: Daily Journals (1)

Dark Predators & Unwanted Passengers

  You’re there, in my every breath and desire – lingering, waiting, and watching. I saw you there, tiptoeing the perimeter of it all, my life, and my world. Hiding like a predator in the darkest depths of consciousness. Someone should have warned me about you. I never saw it happen – I wasn’t prepared. I saw you in the eyes of others. I felt … Continue reading Dark Predators & Unwanted Passengers

Moments: Waters of Change

As I sit listening to a playlist of relaxation music on YouTube, tones of piano fill my ears, and I’m reminded of weekly massages that seem a distant memory now. Just one of many reminders of how quickly life changes. The biggest reminder staring me in the face from the fence line of my backyard. An entire corner of the yard, dedicated to three of … Continue reading Moments: Waters of Change