Dark Truth: Daily Journals (1)

Fire Walls I’ve struggled for nearly a year; struggled to regain any form of structure and consistency. Struggled to ‘get through’ another season of physical and emotional exhaustion. Struggled to break old patterns and build new roads. Struggled to make connections deeper than a thimble. Struggled to commit to the things which bring me joy. But most of all, I have struggled to love and … Continue reading Dark Truth: Daily Journals (1)

Dark Predators & Unwanted Passengers

  You’re there, in my every breath and desire – lingering, waiting, and watching. I saw you there, tiptoeing the perimeter of it all, my life, and my world. Hiding like a predator in the darkest depths of consciousness. Someone should have warned me about you. I never saw it happen – I wasn’t prepared. I saw you in the eyes of others. I felt … Continue reading Dark Predators & Unwanted Passengers

Old Wounds & New Scars

Old Wounds Four winters ago, I found myself hanging from a cliff, dangling and desperate to climb up. I survived that winter, allowing myself to believe I’d never slide off the cliff again. I wasn’t completely wrong, if you’re looking for me, you won’t find me dangling off a cliff. No, you’ll find me crashing through the waves as I’m being pulled down by the … Continue reading Old Wounds & New Scars

Winter – Pt. 1

‘She is not afraid of the snow for her household: for all her household are clothed with scarlet.’ Proverbs 31:21 I’m going to make a bold statement and say that ‘this winter has been the harshest in years!’ Harsh in terms of weather across the entire country of course, but worse, it’s been a beast of a winter for the sensitive types of this world. I can … Continue reading Winter – Pt. 1

A 90-degree Nightmare

I’m completely and utterly lost, and it scares the crap out of me. So much so that I cannot connect with my emotions when I want to. I’m swinging on a pendulum of pain that will not stop. I find myself attempting to manage the sudden shifts from sadness to anger only to find I’ve fallen into a sea of emotional disconnect. Feeling the feels … Continue reading A 90-degree Nightmare

Neon Decadence: Anxiety Lurks

A thought popped into my mind this morning as I climbed out of bed, or maybe it was as I stepped into the shower. In any instance, the thought slammed into me without notice. The idea that ‘achievement motivates me, and failure destroys me.’ As soon as I could see the words clearly, I rolled them around a few times – could it be true? … Continue reading Neon Decadence: Anxiety Lurks

The Fall: The Light in Her Eyes

They were always there; on the table, in her purse, and forever in her hand. The hand that was meant to hold mine, ever-consumed by that which will kill her. They were always there, taking up space – silently drawing her in. Menthol filling the air. Tainting the walls of her delicately conceived dream. Though they were accepted as a normal part of our lives, I … Continue reading The Fall: The Light in Her Eyes