Old Wounds & New Scars

Old Wounds Four winters ago, I found myself hanging from a cliff, dangling and desperate to climb up. I survived that winter, allowing myself to believe I’d never slide off the cliff again. I wasn’t completely wrong, if you’re looking for me, you won’t find me dangling off a cliff. No, you’ll find me crashing through the waves as I’m being pulled down by the … Continue reading Old Wounds & New Scars

God’s Grace: Purpose & Perseverence

‘Not only so, but we also glory in our sufferings, because we know that suffering produces perseverance; perseverance, character; and character, hope. And hope does not put us to shame because God’s love has been poured out into our hearts through the Holy Spirit, who has been given to us.’ Romans 5:3-5   I sit here this morning a bag of mixed emotions but not … Continue reading God’s Grace: Purpose & Perseverence

Moments – Heaven on Earth Pt. 1

‘He gathers the waters of the sea into jars;  he puts the deep into storehouses. Let all the earth fear the Lord; let all the people of the world revere him. For he spoke, and it came to be; he commanded, and it stood firm.’ Psalm 33: 6-9   February 24, 2018 Though my alarm is set for 4:20 and Ed’s for 4:30, a safety measure agreed upon the evening before, I find myself … Continue reading Moments – Heaven on Earth Pt. 1

Moments – The Pond Pt. 2

‘Therefore, as God’s chosen people, holy and dearly loved, clothe yourselves with compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness and patience.’ Colossians 3:12   February 23, 2018 I notice Ed’s truck ahead of me to the right parked next to one of many ponds in our housing development. I ease to the right, careful to make my way up the nearest driveway and onto the sidewalk. I coast … Continue reading Moments – The Pond Pt. 2

Moments – The Pond Pt. 1

‘Thanks be to God for his indescribable gift!’ 2 Corinthians 9:15  I have a way of connecting more with overly charged emotional moments than subtle simple moments. This is something I’m only now realizing. I’ve done a bit a research because that’s what I do, and of course, it’s a direct result or symptom of complex-PTSD. I’m not going to get into a scientific discussion, but … Continue reading Moments – The Pond Pt. 1

Winter – Pt. 1

‘She is not afraid of the snow for her household: for all her household are clothed with scarlet.’ Proverbs 31:21 I’m going to make a bold statement and say that ‘this winter has been the harshest in years!’ Harsh in terms of weather across the entire country of course, but worse, it’s been a beast of a winter for the sensitive types of this world. I can … Continue reading Winter – Pt. 1

A 90-degree Nightmare

I’m completely and utterly lost, and it scares the crap out of me. So much so that I cannot connect with my emotions when I want to. I’m swinging on a pendulum of pain that will not stop. I find myself attempting to manage the sudden shifts from sadness to anger only to find I’ve fallen into a sea of emotional disconnect. Feeling the feels … Continue reading A 90-degree Nightmare